Pretty much for as long as I can remember my youngest son has had struggles when it comes to eating and going potty. When he was a baby he would constantly throw up after he ate. I can’t even tell you how many outfits the two of us went through in a day. His doctor at the time didn’t really have an answer as to why this was happening so we just kept pushing through.
Fast forward to around 6 months of age, time to try out solids. We decided to start with avocado mixed with breastmilk. He wasn’t terribly interested but wasn’t opposed either. He gagged of course but that’s normal for babies who are just starting out so we did t think anything of it. From that point on every food we tried he would gag. Eventually we realized this wasn’t your normal baby learning to eat gagging. We talked to the doctor about our concerns, we did the wait and see for a bit first because maybe he just wasn’t quite ready but it just didn’t get better. At one years old he still wasn’t eating. When he did try he would gag or choke, it was a stressful time to say the least.
We ended up with a referral to the children’s hospital. At this point not only was he not eating but he was going a week or more without pooping. When he could finally go it was a thing over nightmares. It is crippling to see your child in that kind of pain. So for the next year it was test after test and biopsy after biopsy. We got to the point where he recognized the hospital from the outside and would start crying hysterically.
After months and months we were still no closer to an answer. We’ve gone through therapies and medications like you wouldn’t believe. We’ve had scares with his pancreas and liver and still nothing. I ended up nursing him until he was three just so he would have enough in him to survive. There was talks of a g tube if we couldn’t get him eating.
Fortunately he did start to eat solids, to this day though he really struggles to eat. He can go more than half the day without eating and even then there are very few things we can actually get him to eat. His tummy issues are still there too. They seemed to get better for a while but lately it’s been pretty bad. Tonight for example he’s asleep next to me, tummy hard and bloated. Needed to go but can’t or won’t, maybe a bit of both. Some days like today he throws up because his tummy has no more room or maybe from the pain regardless it is awful. I wouldn’t wish this stress on anyone.
It’s not something I talk about all that often but it is definitely something I think about everyday. I worry he’s not getting enough, I worry there is an underlying cause that we haven’t yet discovered. My mind gets carried away to unimaginable fears.
Someday I hope we will get past this, I long for the days where I won’t have to worry about dinner sending him into a panic because it’s not one of the few foods he seems to tolerate. Until then we will just have to keep on pushing through no matter how exhausting it can be.